Tuesday, 13 February 2018

Jersey Shore: See the Latest Teasers ... and Angelina's Return?!

We're going to Jersey Shore, bitch!

Just kidding, we're not -- except we kind of are, because the legendary cast of Jersey Shore is returning back to where all that magic happened, and we get to see it right on our television screens.

Jersey Shore Cast Pic

Or, OK, they're not exactly going back to where all the magic happened.

Instead of returning to the house that was actually on the Jersey shore, they'll be in Miami again.

But still, in a way, we might as well be right there with all of our favorite guidos and guidettes, acting like the hottest messes that ever walked the boardwalk.

And how beautiful is that?

Back in November, we first learned that MTV was bringing back one of the greatest reality shows of all time, and ever since then, we've been anxiously awaiting its return.

Thanks to this new teaser, which finally reveals the premiere date, we now know we don't have to wait too much longer!

Check out the preview, then we'll talk:

OK, so April 5th -- mark your calendars, and be sure to get your GTL in beforehand, because you aren't going to want to miss this.

Just in that quick little video, we see Snooki going to town on a pickle -- just like old times! -- and Pauly D and Vinny rekindling their epic bromance.

Next, there's Snooki humping JWoww, then Ronnie sitting on Vinny's lap, looking absolutely trashed.

Finally we see a shot of the whole gang together before the teaser cuts to a shot of Deena and Snooki standing on the water, where Deena shouts to all who can hear her, "We're your new neighb

Can you imagine?

Next is a teaser with a little more meat to it -- and oh, what exciting meat it is:

That's right! Angelina Pivarnick, AKA the Staten Island Dump, is back!

She knocks on the door and waits patiently until The Situation answers it, then greets him not with a hug or even a handshake, but with "You think I'm a dirty little hamster?!"


"Oh sh-t ..." The Situation says, and it really does look like he had no idea she was going to be there at all.

Dirty Little Hamster

He even asks her "Who sent you?"

She seems friendly enough, at least in this short little clip.

And it's worth noting that she actually has suitcases this time around instead of trash bags.

But we can't imagine that a house with Angelina in it will stay drama-free for long.

Since today is obviously a very blessed day, we have one more precious sneak peek to enjoy:

Remember Ron Ron Juice?!

Of course you do -- how could you possibly forget?

But just in case you did, Ron Ron Juice is a special little drink invented by Ronnie, and as he explains it, it's "the sh-t that gets the night going."

"Whenever that sh-t comes out, it's always a filthy night."

Basically he just cuts up some watermelon slices and some cherries and then throws that stuff in a blender with cranberry juice, vodka, and ice.

Ronnie Ortiz-Magro Pic

Pauly D calls it "the root of all evil," but honestly it does sound pretty delicious.

While the guys are sipping on their juice, The Situation takes a moment to explain some of his life philosophies.

"I wait till the last minute to shave," he explains, "I wait till the last minute to put the shirt on, 'cause then you feel fresh. These are rules to live by."

"Shave last minute, haircut the day of, maybe the tanning and the gym. You gotta do the guido handbook."

If you've ever watched a single episode of Jersey Shore then you know all this, but still, it's comforting to hear all this laid out fresh, isn't it?

Just a little over seven weeks until the season premiere!

*Dover is a small town in Pope County, Arkansas, United States. The population was 1,329 at the 2000 census. It is part of the Russellville Micropolitan Statistical Area. Contents 1 Geography 2 Demographics 3 General info 4 The Dover massacre 5 Notable people 6 References Geography Dover is located at 35°24'2?N 93°6'45?W (35.400597, -93.112534).[1] According to the United States Census Bureau, the city has a total area of 1.8 square miles (4.7 km2), all land. Demographics Historical population Census Pop. %± 1880 368 — 1890 528 43.5% 1900 373 -29.4% 1910 385 3.2% 1920 388 0.8% 1930 510 31.4% 1940 493 -3.3% 1950 510 3.4% 1960 525 2.9% 1970 662 26.1% 1980 948 43.2% 1990 1,055 11.3% 2000 1,329 26.0% 2010 1,378 3.7% Est. 2014 1,397 1.4% U.S. Decennial Census[2] 2014 Estimate[3] As of the census[4] of 2000, there were 1,329 people, 529 households, and 372 families residing in the city. The population density was 732.7 people per square mile (283.5/km²). There were 579 housing units at an average density of 319.2 per square mile (123.5/km²). The racial makeup of the city was 97.37% White, 0.23% Black or African American, 0.68% Native American, 0.15% Asian, 0.60% from other races, and 0.98% from two or more races. 1.96% of the population were Hispanic or Latino of any race. There were 529 households out of which 37.4% had children under the age of 18 living with them, 48.6% were married couples living together, 16.6% had a female householder with no husband present, and 29.5% were non-families. 26.8% of all households were made up of individuals and 14.2% had someone living alone who was 65 years of age or older. The average household size was 2.50 and the average family size was 3.01. In the city the population was spread out with 29.3% under the age of 18, 10.2% from 18 to 24, 28.1% from 25 to 44, 18.6% from 45 to 64, and 13.8% who were 65 years of age or older. The median age was 32 years. For every 100 females there were 79.8 males. For every 100 females age 18 and over, there were 79.0 males. The median income for a household in the city was $27,697, and the median income for a family was $33,879. Males had a median income of $25,625 versus $19,073 for females. The per capita income for the city was $13,261. About 10.6% of families and 14.6% of the population were below the poverty line, including 13.9% of those under age 18 and 14.0% of those age 65 or over. General info Dover was either named by British aristocrats in the 1830s for Dover, Kent, England or by Stephen Rye in 1832 for Dover, Tennessee.[5] Dover was the county seat for Pope County in the 1800s. The original Pope County Courthouse was located where Dover Supermarket now sits. Dover is a small town near Russellville; it has several churches, a grocery store and a hardware store. Dover acts like a satellite city in relation to nearby Russellville[citation needed] and many residents commute regularly for work and education. The Dover massacre On December 22, 1987, Ronald Gene Simmons, of Dover, killed all fourteen members of his family during a Christmas reunion in Dover. Two days later, he continued his killing spree in the county seat of Russellville, having targeted previous employers and co-workers, killing two and wounding two more. Simmons was arrested without resistance, was sentenced to death on December 10, 1989, and executed on June 25, 1990, the quickest sentence-to-execution time in the United States since the death penalty was reinstated in 1976. Notable people L.J. Churchill (December 8, 1902 – October 2, 1987) was a highly regarded civic and political figure in Dover. A Cumberland Presbyterian and a Mason, Churchill served as mayor and on the municipal school board, both nonpartisan positions. He had been state chairman of the Agricultural Stabilization and Conservation Service of the United States Department of Agriculture. Prior to his retirement, he operated L.J. Churchill's General Merchandise Store and was a member of the board of directors of the Bank of Dover. In 1960, he was a Republican candidate for the United States House of Representatives, having been defeated by the incumbent Democrat Dale Alford of Little Rock. Churchill was married to the former Audra Hill and had a son, Eunice Vance "Buck" Churchill, and two daughters, Ola Elaine Churchill Berry and Mary Janea "Polly" Churchill Massey, all of Dover.[6] Robert E. Dale, Republican former member of the Arkansas House of Representatives from Dover, 2009 to 2015 Jeff Davis, 20th Governor of Arkansas (1901-1907), later a US Senator (1907-1913). A very controversial figure, Davis was known for demagoguery and fiery rhetoric to appeal to his agrarian political base while disparaging city dwellers, blacks and Yankees Trevor Drown, Republican member of the Arkansas House of Representatives for Pope and Van Buren counties since 2015; succeeded Robert Dale Virginia Hudson, American flautist and teacher began her musical education at Dover High School. Jared Keylon, rodeo cowboy who qualified for 2012 National Finals Rodeo (birthplace). Ronald Gene Simmons, retired United States Air Force master sergeant who killed sixteen people over a weeklong period in 1987, beginning in Dover
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